Where we are now is as important as our destination

“Selbsterkenntnis ist der erste Schritt zur Besserung.” — German proverb

“Self-awareness is the first step toward self-improvement.” That proverb reminds me of a small incident with a colleague. One day, they asked for directions to my house. I asked, “Where are you right now?” They said they were close, so I replied, “Just go straight—it’s nearby. It shouldn’t take more than five minutes.”

Ten minutes later, they still hadn’t arrived. When I called again and asked where they were, they described a location that was actually farther away. In that moment, I realized my question had been incomplete. I hadn’t asked where they were relative to the route—were they on the right side, the left side, or even facing the right direction? That small detail made a big difference.

The same thing happens when you’re in an unfamiliar place—like a mall, a hospital, or any public space—and you look at a map. Two things matter: where you want to go, and where you are right now. If you don’t know your current position, any direction can mislead you. That’s why knowing where you are is just as important as knowing your destination. Without both, you won’t get anywhere.

This also applies to self-development.

A friend once told me they were calm and serene when facing difficulties. In reality, I often saw them as anxious and reactive. They understood the theory of emotional regulation, and because of that, they assumed they were already good at it. But without an accurate awareness of their current state, improvement became difficult. They believed they had already arrived, when they were still on the way.

This taught me that awareness—especially self-awareness—is one of the most important skills in life. It influences everything: improvement, patience, and gratitude. In Bahasa, I like to remember it as the 3S: Sadar, Syukur, Sabar—Awareness, Gratitude, Patience. And the root of all three is awareness: awareness of yourself and awareness of your surroundings.

How do you build self-awareness?

In one word: practice.

Building self-awareness is simple in concept: just notice what you notice. When you realize your mind has wandered, gently return to the present moment. Do this as often as you can, in any situation.

For Muslims, praying five times a day can be a powerful way to practice presence. For me, I also practice self-awareness through everyday activities—exercising, eating, working—doing them mindfully, without judgment. When you cultivate awareness without judgment, you can accept yourself as you are—both strengths and weaknesses. And that acceptance becomes the first step toward real self-improvement.